Bummed and on bed rest

Bedrest is going to be the word for the rest of my pregnancy. I know it is for the best, I am just feeling guilty, sad, useless. I don't know. I feel like I should have been able to do this right, at least this. We did decide that we are not doing this again. Other than that, Derrick has been trying to be supportive and helpful around the house. Which is good, cause I have a hard time laying there and not doing anything. I feel guilty. My cervix hasn't changed and the contractions are only like 1 or 2 every hour or so. I even tried to weasel my way into working for the rest of December and that didn't work. I see the peri in Denver on Monday. Then I think my mom is coming out next weekend to clean for me and hang curtains and stuff. She also has the crib mattresses and we can get their mattresses put in and their nursery stuff up. I don't have a whole lot to say, I am pretty bummed.