This day is stupid

I know I am a crabass...oh well. I will live. Derrick may lose some important parts though. He has big fat asshole time of the month right now. At least he got a fucking job today. That should make him happy. I don't mean for it to sound like he never works, cause he usually works hard, but with the weather, not so much. Anyway he is going to be helping a company locally. Fantastic. He acts like I love the fact that I have to rely on him to get me to my damn house. I hate it. I hate the snow, I hate the fact that I have to rely on anyone for anything. It pisses me off. I am a very independent person. I love him and love being with him more than anything, but I am sitting in town waiting for him when I should be able to be at home (and get there my own damn self) doing things. Like putting things on my walls. I know part of marriage is helping each other and leaning on each other, but I have never been good at that part. Or I was until...well I won't go there. It has nothing to do with him, but me. AF is kicking my ass. I wanted to get this ball rolling and now that it is here I am scared to death. I am going to take a bubble bath in my new tub, and relax with a bottle (yes the whole bottle) of red wine. Then I am going to have a better day tomorrow. I am also gonna unpack my shoes...or get a new pair...that always helps.